Last night I decided to take nice, long, hot, relaxing bubble bath.

It didn’t exactly turn out that way, though. Ok, it didn’t turn out that way at all.

Here’s what happened.

I got into the shower to rinse off because, well, you know. Taking baths is better when my body is nice and clean.

I was only using the shower for about 2 minutes, I swear.

And then I sat down and turned off the shower and turned on the faucet.

And for about five minutes, hot water ran out slowly into the tub. Then warm water started to run into the tub slowly. And then luke warm water…

Oh boy.

In the mean time, I’d been attempting to make the bubble bath liquid turn into bubbles since the water wasn’t running out fast enough to do that on it’s own. By this time, I’m freezing cold, and wet, and covered in goose bumps all over. There’s only about 2 inches of water in the tub.

So I called Hubs in for support.

He laughed.

(Thanks a lot, Hubs.)

But I convinced him to help.

So he set to work on putting water on the stove to heat.

(Yes, I attempted to make a hot bath like they did in the Laura Ingalls Wilder books. I’m not happy about it or proud.)

(Also, you should know that Hubs protested violently about going along with this plan. But to his credit, he did it.)

I promise it didn’t go this badly when I did this a month or so ago. I mean, I knew the drain leaked a little and so the tub water ran out slowly but I have no idea why our hot water heater ran out of water so fast. Or why the tub was leaking water out almost as fast as I was trying to put it in there…

Now there’s about 5 inches of water in the tub. It’s neither bubbly or hot.

But I decide it’s now or never since the water isn’t getting any warmer and I get out, dry off a bit, and get the candles and the lighter. I light the candles, turn off the lights, and get back in.

Hubs has brought in a total of 4 batches of hot water from the kitchen and I settle in. It’s warm. Sort of. And a little bubbly, I guess.

Hubs also brought in a glass with a frozen margarita and set it on the edge of the tub.

Three seconds later it slides off into the tub and turns over. I grab it as fast as I can because I don’t want the ice to make the water any colder, not because I was worried about it being ruined, although that crossed my mind immediately after as I considered pouring the bath water out and trying to taste it to see if it was soapy or not…

But basically, I’m not feeling this bath anymore.

At all.

Ok, tub. You win.

So I stand up and turn the shower on again to rinse off the bubble and soap residue. Keep in mind we ran out of hot water.

OH MY GOODNESS, I HATE COLD SHOWERS!

After a minute or two, the water heats up enough that I stop hyperventilating and I stand in it for a couple of minutes (I’d been cowering in the corner to avoid the spray) and then I get out, grab a towel, and dive into bed as soon as I’m dry to bury myself under the covers.

That’s why tonight I spent my time making a big chocolate cake. It won’t let me down, I know it.

And I can eat it wrapped in a big blanket.

Note: Some details of this story may be edited slightly to protect our modesty and prevent our friends and family from running away from the computer in an awkward panic.