Last night I was tired.
So, so tired.
I was tired because I’ve been a little sick.
I was tired because I ran a half marathon on Saturday.
I was tired because my body hurt… all over.
So I went to bed at 9:00.
Hubs and his brother stayed up to watch some show on the history channel. I didn’t care at all.
I went to bed.
I think it was the first night since we’ve been married, that we were staying in the same place, that we went to bed separate from each other.
I’ve been dreading that.
And I don’t really know why.
I know it isn’t a big deal if one of us is more tired than the other one. I just don’t want it to become a habit because I want us to learn how to adapt to each other’s sleep schedules and various needs.
But one night apart didn’t seem to hurt.
And you know what?
I’m probably going to go to bed early tonight, too.
I think Hubs is going to come with me tonight, though.
What about you? What makes you head to bed before dark? How tired do you have to be before you suck it up and admit to needing more sleep? Any secrets for feeling less sleepy during the day? What are your thoughts about separate bedtimes?
When we were both working we always were on different shifts. He would be nights, i would be days or second shift, etc. We slept apart a LOT because we wouldn’t wake each other up. Honestly, we slept apart more than together after the first 8-10 years. (oct was our 26th). Truthfully, we each sleep better in our own beds. He likes it darkdark, I like a light; he likes silence, I like the tv on low; he likes a top sheet and maybe one blanket, I like being bundled up in lots of warm, fuzzy quilts and blankets; I sprawl out, he stays compact. Needless to say, we sleep better apart. The secret is to have ONE big bed that you can “come together” in, no matter where you both actually sleep. For us.. its my bed. He has a large twin, I have the double, so mine is the “coming together” bed. We are both less cranky, better rested and less snarky with each other with some decent sleep under our belts. Trust me, it has nothing to do with how much you do or don’t love each other. I adore him and I know he adores me. We just sleep better in our own beds. Sleep is sleep.. marriage is what you do when you are NOT sleeping. Work at that and who cares where you sleep.
That’s a good point about spending quality time together when we’re awake…not when we’re sleeping, but I think that’s part of it for me…the snuggle time we have together before we both fall asleep. I hate missing that time. Once one of us is asleep, there’s no going back! Thanks for the comment! And the new perspective!
HI! This post definitely is relatable. I totally understand dreading the moment one heads to bed without the other. I’ve only done it twice when Tyler stayed up to watch a ball game or something, and I just couldn’t keep my eyes open. I couldn’t return the favor though. One night I had to stay up and do something and Tyler was tired but I begged him so nap on the couch beside me so we could head upstairs together at the same time. There’s just something about our nighttime cuddle routine that I don’t want to miss out on. I’m not sure what exactly it is. People that have been married longer say that it will change and become no big deal. Some say they don’t even say good night, they just find the other asleep. I can’t imagine not wanting to fall asleep together. So you go Melissa! Once is a while happens, but you and I will fall asleep on our man’s arms for many happy years and years to come. 🙂
Thanks! I’m glad you understand my struggles with this issue! I know we’ll have times when we have to go to bed apart, but when we’re together and we’re healthy, we’re going to head to bed together. Hubs doesn’t need the snuggle time as much as me, but I know he appreciates that time, too, even if he wants to fall asleep before I’m all the way ready to shut my eyes… and my mouth! But I agree that we will be holding to this routine for many years, despite what older couples say! Thanks for leaving a comment!
Just wait till you have kids. All your best bedtime goals will be scrambled! I love your header picture! Looks like a beautiful wedding.
Oh, I know! We went to a birthday party last night and the little ones were running around LIKE CRAZY! We love them and the hectic happiness, but I can only imagine it will be a BIG sleeping adjustment! And thanks! Our wedding was an amazing, happy day. Thanks for the comment!