I didn’t have to work today which was a huge blessing because I really needed to get motivated to get back into the swing of housework. Hubs and I had a great little staycation and restful couple of days over the long weekend and our apartment certainly showed evidence of the lazy nights we had spent at home enjoying the coziness of our couch instead of folding and hanging up clean clothes or sorting the mountain of mail on our coffee table.
But as important as it is to me to have our little apartment neat and clean, it’s more important to me to enjoy the time at home with my Hubs. I just had no idea how much I had gotten used to my time at home during the day during the months I wasn’t working!
Don’t get me wrong, I was bored at times and I got tired of sitting on our couch feeling worthless because no one would hire me. (Yes, I admit I had a few pity-party-like moments…) But, the truth of the matter is that I was able to really work on making and keeping our apartment like I wanted it to be.
I have a theory that I’m not very productive around the house at night because Wyatt and I dated long distance so long. When we hung out at either of our houses or apartments at night, we absolutely were not going to waste time doing anything but soaking up every minute we had together. (We were so cute, right?)
I think that’s why I have trouble working around the house once Hubs gets home at night, (or now that I’m working, when I get home and he’s already there…). I also sometimes get annoyed when he plays video games or all we do is sit around and watch TV. We dated so long and saw each other only one or two nights a week, sometimes less than that, for several years, and we learned to do a good job of really focusing on each other in the time we had together. Now that we’re together so much more, it’s easier for Wyatt to relax and just chill out, not necessarily doing “date-like” activities.
And that’s fine.
Really it is.
We don’t have to have a date-like activity to do every night. (However, continuing to date each other is a key aspect in marriage, I believe, and one to not overlook, no matter how busy life may get!) And yes, “QT” will always be something that’s important to me, and us. I’m just learning to see it a bit differently.
I need to learn to appreciate the time we have together doing everyday things like folding laundry and washing dishes and watching American Guns on TV as much as I appreciate the time we have to do other, more date-like things. I can’t always just focus on why we don’t have “QT” (Quality time) as much as we used to.
The fact of the matter is that we DO have as much QT. More even! We have QT every day when we greet each other after work, every night when we’re holding each other tightly before bed, every morning when we’re struggling to open our eyes and get out of bed, every time I lay my head on his shoulder and close my eyes because I’m a bit bored by whatever show we happen to be watching on TV.
I sometimes just have a hard time seeing these moments as quality time when I’m too busy pouting because we aren’t playing a game or going out to a really nice dinner or having a long heart-to-heart conversation or sitting silently staring into each others’ eyes for hours on end…
..Okay, I don’t really want us to do that last thing…I got a bit carried away there.
But you know what I’m trying to say, right?
I just need to do a better job of seeing things his way…in this instance. At least sometimes. Wyatt is so wise, isn’t he?
What about you? Is this something you understand and can relate to? How can I work to overcome the disconnect I sometimes feel when my idea of QT isn’t the same as Hubs’s?